The Guilt of Giving
Hello! Christmas is just around the corner and I’m finished with shopping. I’m pleased with what I’ve picked out for my loved ones. If my family had offered to not exchange gifts this year, I would have been overjoyed. But they didn’t, so I bought gifts. The consumerism associated with Christmas is overwhelming. Trust, I love giving gifts. I like making other people happy. I’m known for picking out the perfect piece, but all of that comes at an emotional cost.
Last week, I went to a holiday party that required a $20 admission or a wrapped gift. I opted for the gift, found a $6 Dora the Explorer game and brought it to the party. Still, a part of me felt guilty, like I had shortchanged the anonymous needy kid I bought the gift for. What’s that about? I know there are a lot of parents out there feeling guilty because they can’t give their children as much stuff year. What’s fabulous about guilt? I say make prudent financial decisions if you want to be fabulous. NO MORE GUILT!
If you spend too much money, you will feel ashamed when you look at your credit card statement in January. Between you and me, I’m a little upset with Santa Claus. Why does he get to be "The Man" because he hands out all the toys? Santa’s buying friends and influence!
Frugalistas, buy what you can afford. If you can’t give, big deal. No more guilt of giving. Tomorrow is another day and Christmas is just one day!
Happy Holidays,
FRUGALista
12 Responses to The Guilt of Giving
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I find that most people – kids included – can only keep track of about five presents. You don’t even remember what you’ve gotten once the gift total passes five.
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Several years ago my husband and I started giving baskets with gifts we made (spicy peanut brittle, Khalua brownies, fruit vinegars, candies, etc.) for the adults in the family and limited children’s gifts to the cash on hand. I cannot tell you how nice it is to have January come and not have big credit card bills.
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The way I see it, you have all year round to show a person that you care and to purchase a gift.
Have a great day Frugalista.
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My goal every year is to have Christmas shopping done by Thanksgiving. I just don’t have the money to go out and blow hundreds of dollars in December, or any given month. I find that if I shop during the year, I get better gifts, and am less likely to buy something overpriced.
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My husband and I don’t have children yet, but we are seriously considering it in the next 1-2 years. After learning that our in-laws spent 3 hours wrapping gifts for their 2 kids (and they STILL aren’t done), we were disgusted. And vowed to NEVER go through such silliness. Like Rippy said the kids will pick 5 gifts at most to swoon over and you will be stuck with a bill you can’t pay in January. Come on people!
Like Katt Williams said, just take $100 and head to the 99 cents store. LOL!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZxMMWUeoiuc
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I’m so with you. I bought a $6 gift for my neice. I can’t afford a lot — we bought their family a stuffed animal and a few DVDs. Thank goodness we all trade names — can you imagine buying for all 16 of my neices and nephews? The family that has us — the dad is out of work. I told the wife not to get us anything, she insisted and she’s making us some of her homemade salsa.
It’s not the pricy gifts that matter, they aren’t the reason for the season.
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A freak snowstorm completely derailed my last minute Xmas shopping. I was mostly done but I definitely needed to spend an afternoon buying a few more things.
I always go the route of an inexpensive gift, but it’s usually a like-new used present. Nothing to feel bad about.
$100 at the dollar store? Crap, crap and more crap. No thank you!
Kahlua brownies? I think I’m in love!
-Katy Wolk-Stanley
“Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without.”
http://thenonconsumeradvocate.com
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Hi Natalie,
After being married 19 years I am finding it harder to shop for my wife. If finances were unlimited I would simply buy her jewelry. But, unfortunately, we live in the real world here.
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Rippy: I believe it! It all becomes stuff after a while.
Lou: Kahlua brownies! I have no doubt your gift baskets are a hit.
PJD: I cosign!
GLM: Sage advice
Tameika: I LOVE THE LINK! This Christmas is the first time that I tuned into how parents get batty during this time of year. Parents, don’t let your children turn you into elves!
Natalie: As a budding foodie, I think that homemade salsa is just perfect. Sixteen nieces and nephews? I know you have the best holiday gatherings!
Katy: I say dessert is at Lou’s house! Up with drunken desserts! hehehe
Debt Relief: Why is it so hard to buy for people you love the most? Mom’s gift gave me the most trouble.
Great conversation!
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Katy, isn’t it all crap? That’s the point of the comedic piece. Think about it. I can count the truly memorable gifts from my childhood on one hand and probably still have fingers left. And as an only child I got a lot of crap that cost WAY more than 99 cents. Ma and Pa Dukes could have saved a lot of money by following Katt’s advice! lol
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I can honestly say that I don’t feel guilty purchasing numerous gifts this year… we’ve paid out so much money for fuel and food this year alone It was refreshing to go out and just spend! I’ve been holding out on purchasing lots of things I wanted (and somethings I needed) for so long that I did go all out! Made a feast of a meal for family and friends and gave gifts and didn’t use one credit card! I really did find some great bargains out there this year. There were a few store going out of business and man they had some deals! In the past I would feel guilty about spending money so lavishly but sista needed relief!
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@Anji-It sounds like you had an awesome Christmas and that you were thoughtful with your spending. Add me to your list next year!
Rippy